Hi! I’m Emily. Tasha asked me if I would write a blog post for The Edited, and I am absolutely honoured to participate! I’ve struggled with self-love my whole life, but in the past couple of years I was struck by the realization that other people’s opinions don’t matter!
A few years ago a not so nice man did some not so nice things to me. As a way of coping I created my own world, and didn’t let many people in. This made living in a new town even more difficult because I didn’t have too many friends and trusted few people to become my friends. I also became extra aware of how much of my life could be seen on social media. Did I really want a stranger to be able to see that I had pizza for lunch after making a post about it? So I made all of my accounts private. But then I wondered how much even my friends should be able to see. So I deactivated all of my accounts. In the end, deleting myself from society didn’t help. I had to deal with all of my issues in a better way.
I finished my year of school and moved home. I got in touch with my old friends, went back to working my minimum wage job, and began seeing a therapist. The world of negativity that I had created was reopened, and I was no longer by myself
This isn’t all to say that I now have a perfect life – it’s far from it. But I am happy with the choices I have made and I don’t have to worry as much about what other people do. I don’t let my anxiety control every aspect of my life (although I did pick off all of my nail polish while I was writing this), and that has led me to love myself so much more than I ever though would be possible.
So I guess my main message is that we all need to take care of ourselves first. If we don’t love ourselves, how can we share love with anyone else?